Truth is, I created a new blog. This can be found at the following address:
www.onedayolderandwisertoo.blogspot.com
Just in case you were wondering!
Thanks!
Viki
Thursday, May 2, 2013
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
An evening with Alzheimer's
No - this title isn't meant to describe a typical evening in which I forget one or more of my responsibilities because I frankly get too many things on my plate...but it is more of a literal tale in reference to the title....read on, if you please....
I have worked with lots of patients with Alzheimer's in my life - going back to the time when I was a CNA at the tender age of 16. I remember feeling something strange in my heart for those patients. Something akin to sorrow, I think. Maybe a distant sorrow, but sadness for sure. And then when my own sweet maternal grandmother was stricken with the horrible disease, I had a different view on it. It became a bit more, well, personal. I began to see more in-depth the pain that can come to the victims of the disease - the family and loved ones. How piece by piece their faces and their names are slowly torn form the tongue of the patient and then from the eyes and eventually from the mind. It is a sort of pain that doesn't diminish with time, but rather increases with time, as the memories fade and fade and soon are gone.
Over the past 7 or so years I have not been around many Alzheimer's patients at all, seeing as how the patient population that I work with are mostly in the midst of their child-bearing years. But, just the other night I was floated to a different floor to do what is called a 1:1, or another way of saying "babysitting". This is generally what they are required to do when there is a patient that needs an additional amount of direct care and observation, due to a variety of reasons. Usually they are a 'high fall risk' or are combative or confused and therefore are not safe to be left alone for any period of time. The patient that I was helping that night was a sweet old lady, nearly 90 years old, who happened to also be afflicted with Alzheimer's. I nearly said 'suffering from Alzheimer's', but ironically, I am not completely sure that the patient actually 'suffers' once they are past a certain point. Anyhow, It was interesting for me to be around this mentality again, after so many years. I had many thoughts come flooding back to me of my own grandma and others I had cared for years ago.
After introducing myself to the patient and checking on her pain level and seeing if I could help her get more comfortable, I began to chat with her. I would ask anything I could think of. Most of the time, the responses were always simple and in agreement with whatever I had asked. "Are you from this area?" "Do you have family around?" "What did your late spouse do for work?" "Did you ever own a pet?" You know, just 'get-to-know-you' type questions. Not that I would ever take anything said as accurate, but more as a means to be pleasant and offer company, no more.
But there was a point during our 'conversations' in which she began to ramble on a bit more about her childhood. It was as if she were transported back to her younger years and she would then begin to say with a look of almost shame and regret and in a sort of a baby talk voice, "I was a bad witto girl". I didn't get where she was coming from, saying that she was a 'bad little girl' like that. But I laughed it off the first time and then changed the topic. But no matter what topic I brought up, she kept going back to it. When I was asking her about her pets, she would say something about how she wasn't very kind to them, because she was a 'bad witto girl". I asked her about family, and she would say, "Well, I think I was a bad witto girl because that is what they told me I was, so that is how I was."
Soon I was getting almost sad for her. Sad that of all of the millions of jumbled up garbled up confused memories stored in her brain, the one that kept coming out was that of being a naughty child. I finally leaned in close to her and said, "Well, isn't it great that we can all change and that people can forgive other people?" Then I saw it. It was hard to describe. It was like a tiny tiny tiny flicker of hope in the recess of her corneas. A small smile broke across her wrinkled face. She responded, "Well, I suppose you are right, dear."
Before another ten seconds had elapsed from that moment, she was back to telling me about how she had never been in a hospital and about the picture of the girl that WASN'T on the wall and about the little kitty cat that WASN'T sitting at the foot of her bed.
I may be reading a lot more into this than actually occurred, but it was a moment that touched my soul. It was a chance for me to reflect on just how very very grateful I myself am for the magnanimous gifts of repentance and forgiveness. I was able to see in my mind a day in the future when I will be sitting before my King, my Judge, and be able to look into his eyes and feel that even though at times in my life I may have been a 'bad witto girl' I was rescued from my sin, pulled up from my darkness, held up in my moments of doubt and wrapped up in love in every moments of true grief and pain. I will one day be free from all guilt and sorrow and hurt, and feel ONLY love. Only LOVE will permeate my thoughts and my memories.
That is what I wish for that sweet lady with whom I crossed paths for only a few hours and whom I shall likely never see again in my life. That is what I wish for all who suffer from the deep despair, devastation and loneliness that is Alzheimer's.
And if, per chance, I live to such a beautifully ripe age as this sweet woman, please, if I am ever on the other side of the haziness that is Alzheimer's, will somebody please find this post, and read it to me, and look into my eyes for a flicker of hope?
Thank you sincerely.
Viki Ann
I have worked with lots of patients with Alzheimer's in my life - going back to the time when I was a CNA at the tender age of 16. I remember feeling something strange in my heart for those patients. Something akin to sorrow, I think. Maybe a distant sorrow, but sadness for sure. And then when my own sweet maternal grandmother was stricken with the horrible disease, I had a different view on it. It became a bit more, well, personal. I began to see more in-depth the pain that can come to the victims of the disease - the family and loved ones. How piece by piece their faces and their names are slowly torn form the tongue of the patient and then from the eyes and eventually from the mind. It is a sort of pain that doesn't diminish with time, but rather increases with time, as the memories fade and fade and soon are gone.
Over the past 7 or so years I have not been around many Alzheimer's patients at all, seeing as how the patient population that I work with are mostly in the midst of their child-bearing years. But, just the other night I was floated to a different floor to do what is called a 1:1, or another way of saying "babysitting". This is generally what they are required to do when there is a patient that needs an additional amount of direct care and observation, due to a variety of reasons. Usually they are a 'high fall risk' or are combative or confused and therefore are not safe to be left alone for any period of time. The patient that I was helping that night was a sweet old lady, nearly 90 years old, who happened to also be afflicted with Alzheimer's. I nearly said 'suffering from Alzheimer's', but ironically, I am not completely sure that the patient actually 'suffers' once they are past a certain point. Anyhow, It was interesting for me to be around this mentality again, after so many years. I had many thoughts come flooding back to me of my own grandma and others I had cared for years ago.
After introducing myself to the patient and checking on her pain level and seeing if I could help her get more comfortable, I began to chat with her. I would ask anything I could think of. Most of the time, the responses were always simple and in agreement with whatever I had asked. "Are you from this area?" "Do you have family around?" "What did your late spouse do for work?" "Did you ever own a pet?" You know, just 'get-to-know-you' type questions. Not that I would ever take anything said as accurate, but more as a means to be pleasant and offer company, no more.
But there was a point during our 'conversations' in which she began to ramble on a bit more about her childhood. It was as if she were transported back to her younger years and she would then begin to say with a look of almost shame and regret and in a sort of a baby talk voice, "I was a bad witto girl". I didn't get where she was coming from, saying that she was a 'bad little girl' like that. But I laughed it off the first time and then changed the topic. But no matter what topic I brought up, she kept going back to it. When I was asking her about her pets, she would say something about how she wasn't very kind to them, because she was a 'bad witto girl". I asked her about family, and she would say, "Well, I think I was a bad witto girl because that is what they told me I was, so that is how I was."
Soon I was getting almost sad for her. Sad that of all of the millions of jumbled up garbled up confused memories stored in her brain, the one that kept coming out was that of being a naughty child. I finally leaned in close to her and said, "Well, isn't it great that we can all change and that people can forgive other people?" Then I saw it. It was hard to describe. It was like a tiny tiny tiny flicker of hope in the recess of her corneas. A small smile broke across her wrinkled face. She responded, "Well, I suppose you are right, dear."
Before another ten seconds had elapsed from that moment, she was back to telling me about how she had never been in a hospital and about the picture of the girl that WASN'T on the wall and about the little kitty cat that WASN'T sitting at the foot of her bed.
I may be reading a lot more into this than actually occurred, but it was a moment that touched my soul. It was a chance for me to reflect on just how very very grateful I myself am for the magnanimous gifts of repentance and forgiveness. I was able to see in my mind a day in the future when I will be sitting before my King, my Judge, and be able to look into his eyes and feel that even though at times in my life I may have been a 'bad witto girl' I was rescued from my sin, pulled up from my darkness, held up in my moments of doubt and wrapped up in love in every moments of true grief and pain. I will one day be free from all guilt and sorrow and hurt, and feel ONLY love. Only LOVE will permeate my thoughts and my memories.
That is what I wish for that sweet lady with whom I crossed paths for only a few hours and whom I shall likely never see again in my life. That is what I wish for all who suffer from the deep despair, devastation and loneliness that is Alzheimer's.
And if, per chance, I live to such a beautifully ripe age as this sweet woman, please, if I am ever on the other side of the haziness that is Alzheimer's, will somebody please find this post, and read it to me, and look into my eyes for a flicker of hope?
Thank you sincerely.
Viki Ann
Monday, December 17, 2012
In the HOV lane...
This post was written on 11/28...
Here I was thinking to myself, "Self, I had really better get on that old blog and blog something. I bet it has been about a month!" Haha...last entry - August 30? Actually - I did blog about our trip to Cali - so I will post that blog before I post this one. Double fun!! That's so typical me. Running through my days, feeling super busy, coming to the end, realizing it feels like I haven't done much, then I just pray for strength to make it through one more day with all I have on my plate, and then keep on muddling through, hoping I don't screw up anything too important! It sometimes feels like I am currently living my life in the HOV lane! Likely because I usually have a very "high occupancy" load with me and I often feel like I am just zooming along, passing people I should probably take time to just be next to and visit with. Ugh.
Here is what has been going on since our lovely vacay to California. We did some fun apple canning with lots of sticky messes and ended up with yummy apple pie filling that we have been enjoying. We had our annual tradition of carving pumpkins with our friends the Olsons. I love that we keep this tradition up - even though we don't get to spend a lot of time with them anymore, it is always a fun time when we get together. What a great family. We had a fun Halloween Carnival for our ward at church. Sadie and I got to go on a fun trip to Utah - just the two of us - to help work on our Festival of Trees tree.
Speaking of Sadie...she also decided to go ahead without my permission and turn a DOUBLE DIGIT age! I can't believe that she is already ten years old. She is so much fun - and I am loving watching her personality develop each day! What a blessing my sweet Sadie Ann is in my life. Only a few days later I was again reminded of how these kids are on the fast track to being little adults as my oldest turned 15!! Maelynn is 15! I can hardly believe it. I was just barely that age! I wanted to throw her a quinceanera - but instead she just wanted to have a few friends over and go to hang out at the mall and then do some crazy "Just Dance 4" here! She is such a beautiful girl and I can't imagine my life without her. I love that she is growing up, but not becoming annoying or rude, only independent and helpful. What a true JOY my sweet Maelynn JOY is to me!
Thanksgiving was again done at our own little home. I actually LOVE to make pies and treats and all things YUMMY in the fall. Suffice it to say I spent quite a bit of time in my apron! I made 3 delicious, everything-from-scratch pies. Like the pie crust from Crisco, butter, margarine, etc. YUP, you read that right...three different fats! Lemon meringue pie with fresh grated lemons and eggs from my chickens and all! I also did a pumpkin pie and an apple pie. I even went so far as to do the lattice work on the top. We also made apple pie cookies, pumpkin cinnamon rolls with eggnog frosting, and pumpkin fudge. I'm pretty sure that I went over-board, but hey, I had to work from 3-midnight at the hospital on Thanksgiving day, so I wanted to make our 12:30 pm Thanksgiving feast as wonderful as I could.
I have been thinking lately about how so many people (myself included) will say things like "I'm doing the best I can" or "She's just doing the best she can". But I would venture to say that in the majority of cases, that is actually FALSE. I truly don't believe that we are doing the best we can, on most days. I really like the sentiment and have said it myself many times. I completely understand and I know for a fact that we can't be perfect in this life. But, I don't feel like I am giving it my "best" everyday. I don't feel like it is too much for me to have a goal to actually DO the best I can. I am taking about little things each day that can improve, nothing major here. I mean, I can actually spend a little more time on my knees, just LISTENING after I pray, instead of quickly jumping up when I utter AMEN. I can set aside a specific date and time for my temple attendance each month, instead of just rushing over whenever I can fit it in. I can go and visit the primary children I am always thinking of, instead of just thinking of them and praying for them. And, of course, I am sure I could continue this list in a million other little things. So my goal, for now, is to be able to go to bed at night and instead of justifying to myself why I didn't get such and such done, because 'I was simply doing the best I could', I want to be able to mentally list off to myself the ways that I honestly strove to 'do my best' that day. And hopefully, one day at a time, I will get there. NO, not to perfection, but to being able to look in the mirror of my life at the close of my mortality and honestly feel that I DID the BEST I COULD! Because, thanks be to Heaven, I know my Savior's amazing love will fill in all the gaps!
12/16/12
On a very somber and sad note, I want to talk about the horrible massacre in Connecticut. Actually, it has affected me so much - as I am sure it has affected everyone in America and throughout the world who owns a beating heart.
The day it happened - also just so happened to be the 7th birthday of my sweet Lane. I am afraid that the events of the day really overshadowed my little guy's big day. I had stayed up all night (or a large part of it) the night before as I was helping my hubby to make cookies for a 'dessert competition' for his work party, and to make cookies for Lane to share with his class. I was seeing the news coming in shortly after it happened, like all of the different reports of what was really going on, the confusion, the non-stop airing of reporters getting various stories. I was feeling literally sick to my stomach. I began to cry, almost uncontrollably as I read what was going on there. I happened to have an older child at home at the time (Landen was sick) and he was asking me why I was crying. I told him. His first question was, "Did they get the guy"? I said, "Thankfully, yes, they did." This was before they knew he had taken his own life, so at the time I imagined that the heroic cops took him out.
I left Landen at home with the little boys and walked over to the school carrying the plates of cookies and treats for Lane's class. I signed in at the front desk of the school, and it was like I was in a fog or something - my eyes were red from crying and my head was hurting from the same. Our principal happened to be there and asked if he could walk down to the classroom with me. I wanted to talk about it, and he was asking me questions, but I think I was sort of 'out there' mentally. So, I know you never read my blog, but I apologize for acting all weird that day, Mr. Emfield. I was only thinking to myself the whole time about how everything happening could have been happening here at our school, how nobody is immune from evil.
I got to Lane's classroom, and I handed the plates of goodies to the teacher who was standing up front and came over to me. I explained to her that Lane was excited to share the treats and then it just came out of me...like seeing her there, the sweet teacher teaching my innocent little 7 year old first grader. I told her what was going on in Connecticut. I started to tear up just mentioning it to her in a very brief and very hushed conversation over a plate of goodies in our shared hands. She hadn't been made aware of it at that point, and I felt horrible being the one to share the awful news. I wanted to grab her and hug her right then and there. I wanted to run across the room and grab Lane and hug him. Tightly. But I knew I couldn't. I couldn't scare the children that way. I actually didn't even look at my child. I didn't. I couldn't.
I left the room and headed down the hallway. For some reason, I just wanted to get out of the school as fast as I could at that point. I went down the hallway and looked into the 6th grade classroom, where one of my other sons spends his days. It was empty, all but the teacher at her desk. I opened her door to see if I could cut through her classroom to get outside even faster. She said I could and I started to walk through and as our eyes met, I knew at that moment that she was reading about it on her computer right then. We had a brief conversation about the incredible events that were still unfolding, and I bore my soul to her about my fears for the future of my children and their education. Thankfully, we are both of the same religious and spiritual convictions and I was able to do so without fear of scorn or disapproval. I exited the back door of her classroom and almost ran the 150 or so yards to my house. I hurried inside and turned around to look out my window at the school where all 5 of my older children go. I said a prayer of gratitude right then and there for the comfort I have of being that close to them every day.
I really think to myself sometimes that I don't want to talk about it. Too painful. Then, at other moments, I really do want to talk about it. I find myself wanting to KNOW all of the details. People may think that I am morbid, but truly I am not. I just find that the more I know about something, the better I can process and deal with it. I read in one of the umpteen billion articles about the shooting, that all of the victims were shot multiple times. I read about how the shooter used hollow point bullets that are meant to inflict maximum damage. I read that the police had the parents and families identify their dead children by photos instead of seeing the body in person because of how bad it was. I thought to myself, if it were my sweet little 7 year old Lane, I would protest. I would beg and scream and plead to let me see him. I would hold his little body, no matter how torn apart or mangled. I would hold every piece of him next to me and probably scream and plead with God and cry and cry and cry and kiss whatever I could of him and in my own way, tell him goodbye. That is just me. I think about those things. I put myself in their shoes and I weep for them. For each one of them. I read every single thing I can about every new update on the case. Not because I want to be obsessed with it - but because I want to somehow feel what any given parent or loved one may feel. I would want to know if my child suffered, I would want to know how long they did. I would want to know how much pain they were in, or for how long. I would want to know how much fear they felt, and for how long. I just would.
Then, in my heart of hearts, I know that despite all of the pain and sorrow and anguish and grief I would be going through, I would eventually come to a place of peace, because of my testimony of the eternal plan of happiness. I know I would never be the same person again, or the same wife again to my husband, or the same mother again to my other children, because I would have a permanent hole in me for the rest of mortality, but I would know in my heart of hearts that the hole in my heart would eventually be made WHOLE because of the holes in His hands and feet.
What makes me literally ache, is the thought of the hundreds of survivors, who were thankfully spared their lives this last friday, but who will now carry around with them emotional and mental scars for the rest of their mortal lives. And the families of the victims and the survivors who do not have a testimony as I do of the plan of happiness - the plan of salvation.
I know that there are millions upon millions of prayers being said as a result of the unspeakable evil that befell the tiny town of Newton. And if but for that reason alone, there is one good thing come from this act, and many others in history that have humbled people to their core, it is the turning to God again. I often picture him anxiously waiting for us, His children, as we go about our lives, quickly forgetting the source of all our blessings, and busying ourselves with meaningless tasks. I imagine him thinking, "How oft would I have gathered you, as a hen gathereth her chicks, and YE WOULD NOT..." I don't want to think of my Savior ever feeling that way about me, that I have turned away from Him, or forgotten Him. I am sure that there are times when He does, and that bothers me. I want to live my life in a way that I will feel like I am always there, under his protective wing, all gathered in.
And at this time of seemingly unquenchable pain and intolerable suffering that is abounding everywhere, this is my simple prayer.... I want to picture every single one of the survivors, the children whose eyes beheld and whose ears heard, the other staff and the paramedics and the police forces, and the families of the slain....each and every one of them....being enveloped in His wing, wrapped in the warmth and comfort of His truths, and held in His loving embrace.
I pray for that, for each one of them, for today, and for every day that they are hurting, until that perfect day, when all evil will be GONE, when Christ will reign personally upon the Earth.
At this Christmas time, there is one song that keeps replaying through my mind over and over and over, and I sing it with real intent and desire, "O Come, O Come, Emmanuel."
Oh, come, oh, come, Emmanuel,
And ransom captive Israel,
That mourns in lonely exile here
Until the Son of God appear.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to you, O Israel!
Oh, come O Rod of Jesse's stem,
From ev'ry foe deliver them
That trust your mighty pow'r to save;
Bring them in vict'ry through the grave.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to you, O Israel!
Oh, come, O Key of David, come,
And open wide our heav'nly home;
Make safe the way that leads on high,
And close the path to misery.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to you, O Israel!
Oh, come, our Dayspring from on high,
And cheer us by your drawing nigh,
Disperse the gloomy clouds of night,
And death's dark shadows put to flight.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to you, O Israel!
Oh, come, Desire of nations, bind
In one the hearts of all mankind;
Oh, bid our sad divisions cease,
And be yourself our King of Peace.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to you, O Israel!
Here I was thinking to myself, "Self, I had really better get on that old blog and blog something. I bet it has been about a month!" Haha...last entry - August 30? Actually - I did blog about our trip to Cali - so I will post that blog before I post this one. Double fun!! That's so typical me. Running through my days, feeling super busy, coming to the end, realizing it feels like I haven't done much, then I just pray for strength to make it through one more day with all I have on my plate, and then keep on muddling through, hoping I don't screw up anything too important! It sometimes feels like I am currently living my life in the HOV lane! Likely because I usually have a very "high occupancy" load with me and I often feel like I am just zooming along, passing people I should probably take time to just be next to and visit with. Ugh.
Here is what has been going on since our lovely vacay to California. We did some fun apple canning with lots of sticky messes and ended up with yummy apple pie filling that we have been enjoying. We had our annual tradition of carving pumpkins with our friends the Olsons. I love that we keep this tradition up - even though we don't get to spend a lot of time with them anymore, it is always a fun time when we get together. What a great family. We had a fun Halloween Carnival for our ward at church. Sadie and I got to go on a fun trip to Utah - just the two of us - to help work on our Festival of Trees tree.
Speaking of Sadie...she also decided to go ahead without my permission and turn a DOUBLE DIGIT age! I can't believe that she is already ten years old. She is so much fun - and I am loving watching her personality develop each day! What a blessing my sweet Sadie Ann is in my life. Only a few days later I was again reminded of how these kids are on the fast track to being little adults as my oldest turned 15!! Maelynn is 15! I can hardly believe it. I was just barely that age! I wanted to throw her a quinceanera - but instead she just wanted to have a few friends over and go to hang out at the mall and then do some crazy "Just Dance 4" here! She is such a beautiful girl and I can't imagine my life without her. I love that she is growing up, but not becoming annoying or rude, only independent and helpful. What a true JOY my sweet Maelynn JOY is to me!
Thanksgiving was again done at our own little home. I actually LOVE to make pies and treats and all things YUMMY in the fall. Suffice it to say I spent quite a bit of time in my apron! I made 3 delicious, everything-from-scratch pies. Like the pie crust from Crisco, butter, margarine, etc. YUP, you read that right...three different fats! Lemon meringue pie with fresh grated lemons and eggs from my chickens and all! I also did a pumpkin pie and an apple pie. I even went so far as to do the lattice work on the top. We also made apple pie cookies, pumpkin cinnamon rolls with eggnog frosting, and pumpkin fudge. I'm pretty sure that I went over-board, but hey, I had to work from 3-midnight at the hospital on Thanksgiving day, so I wanted to make our 12:30 pm Thanksgiving feast as wonderful as I could.
I have been thinking lately about how so many people (myself included) will say things like "I'm doing the best I can" or "She's just doing the best she can". But I would venture to say that in the majority of cases, that is actually FALSE. I truly don't believe that we are doing the best we can, on most days. I really like the sentiment and have said it myself many times. I completely understand and I know for a fact that we can't be perfect in this life. But, I don't feel like I am giving it my "best" everyday. I don't feel like it is too much for me to have a goal to actually DO the best I can. I am taking about little things each day that can improve, nothing major here. I mean, I can actually spend a little more time on my knees, just LISTENING after I pray, instead of quickly jumping up when I utter AMEN. I can set aside a specific date and time for my temple attendance each month, instead of just rushing over whenever I can fit it in. I can go and visit the primary children I am always thinking of, instead of just thinking of them and praying for them. And, of course, I am sure I could continue this list in a million other little things. So my goal, for now, is to be able to go to bed at night and instead of justifying to myself why I didn't get such and such done, because 'I was simply doing the best I could', I want to be able to mentally list off to myself the ways that I honestly strove to 'do my best' that day. And hopefully, one day at a time, I will get there. NO, not to perfection, but to being able to look in the mirror of my life at the close of my mortality and honestly feel that I DID the BEST I COULD! Because, thanks be to Heaven, I know my Savior's amazing love will fill in all the gaps!
12/16/12
On a very somber and sad note, I want to talk about the horrible massacre in Connecticut. Actually, it has affected me so much - as I am sure it has affected everyone in America and throughout the world who owns a beating heart.
The day it happened - also just so happened to be the 7th birthday of my sweet Lane. I am afraid that the events of the day really overshadowed my little guy's big day. I had stayed up all night (or a large part of it) the night before as I was helping my hubby to make cookies for a 'dessert competition' for his work party, and to make cookies for Lane to share with his class. I was seeing the news coming in shortly after it happened, like all of the different reports of what was really going on, the confusion, the non-stop airing of reporters getting various stories. I was feeling literally sick to my stomach. I began to cry, almost uncontrollably as I read what was going on there. I happened to have an older child at home at the time (Landen was sick) and he was asking me why I was crying. I told him. His first question was, "Did they get the guy"? I said, "Thankfully, yes, they did." This was before they knew he had taken his own life, so at the time I imagined that the heroic cops took him out.
I left Landen at home with the little boys and walked over to the school carrying the plates of cookies and treats for Lane's class. I signed in at the front desk of the school, and it was like I was in a fog or something - my eyes were red from crying and my head was hurting from the same. Our principal happened to be there and asked if he could walk down to the classroom with me. I wanted to talk about it, and he was asking me questions, but I think I was sort of 'out there' mentally. So, I know you never read my blog, but I apologize for acting all weird that day, Mr. Emfield. I was only thinking to myself the whole time about how everything happening could have been happening here at our school, how nobody is immune from evil.
I got to Lane's classroom, and I handed the plates of goodies to the teacher who was standing up front and came over to me. I explained to her that Lane was excited to share the treats and then it just came out of me...like seeing her there, the sweet teacher teaching my innocent little 7 year old first grader. I told her what was going on in Connecticut. I started to tear up just mentioning it to her in a very brief and very hushed conversation over a plate of goodies in our shared hands. She hadn't been made aware of it at that point, and I felt horrible being the one to share the awful news. I wanted to grab her and hug her right then and there. I wanted to run across the room and grab Lane and hug him. Tightly. But I knew I couldn't. I couldn't scare the children that way. I actually didn't even look at my child. I didn't. I couldn't.
I left the room and headed down the hallway. For some reason, I just wanted to get out of the school as fast as I could at that point. I went down the hallway and looked into the 6th grade classroom, where one of my other sons spends his days. It was empty, all but the teacher at her desk. I opened her door to see if I could cut through her classroom to get outside even faster. She said I could and I started to walk through and as our eyes met, I knew at that moment that she was reading about it on her computer right then. We had a brief conversation about the incredible events that were still unfolding, and I bore my soul to her about my fears for the future of my children and their education. Thankfully, we are both of the same religious and spiritual convictions and I was able to do so without fear of scorn or disapproval. I exited the back door of her classroom and almost ran the 150 or so yards to my house. I hurried inside and turned around to look out my window at the school where all 5 of my older children go. I said a prayer of gratitude right then and there for the comfort I have of being that close to them every day.
I really think to myself sometimes that I don't want to talk about it. Too painful. Then, at other moments, I really do want to talk about it. I find myself wanting to KNOW all of the details. People may think that I am morbid, but truly I am not. I just find that the more I know about something, the better I can process and deal with it. I read in one of the umpteen billion articles about the shooting, that all of the victims were shot multiple times. I read about how the shooter used hollow point bullets that are meant to inflict maximum damage. I read that the police had the parents and families identify their dead children by photos instead of seeing the body in person because of how bad it was. I thought to myself, if it were my sweet little 7 year old Lane, I would protest. I would beg and scream and plead to let me see him. I would hold his little body, no matter how torn apart or mangled. I would hold every piece of him next to me and probably scream and plead with God and cry and cry and cry and kiss whatever I could of him and in my own way, tell him goodbye. That is just me. I think about those things. I put myself in their shoes and I weep for them. For each one of them. I read every single thing I can about every new update on the case. Not because I want to be obsessed with it - but because I want to somehow feel what any given parent or loved one may feel. I would want to know if my child suffered, I would want to know how long they did. I would want to know how much pain they were in, or for how long. I would want to know how much fear they felt, and for how long. I just would.
Then, in my heart of hearts, I know that despite all of the pain and sorrow and anguish and grief I would be going through, I would eventually come to a place of peace, because of my testimony of the eternal plan of happiness. I know I would never be the same person again, or the same wife again to my husband, or the same mother again to my other children, because I would have a permanent hole in me for the rest of mortality, but I would know in my heart of hearts that the hole in my heart would eventually be made WHOLE because of the holes in His hands and feet.
What makes me literally ache, is the thought of the hundreds of survivors, who were thankfully spared their lives this last friday, but who will now carry around with them emotional and mental scars for the rest of their mortal lives. And the families of the victims and the survivors who do not have a testimony as I do of the plan of happiness - the plan of salvation.
I know that there are millions upon millions of prayers being said as a result of the unspeakable evil that befell the tiny town of Newton. And if but for that reason alone, there is one good thing come from this act, and many others in history that have humbled people to their core, it is the turning to God again. I often picture him anxiously waiting for us, His children, as we go about our lives, quickly forgetting the source of all our blessings, and busying ourselves with meaningless tasks. I imagine him thinking, "How oft would I have gathered you, as a hen gathereth her chicks, and YE WOULD NOT..." I don't want to think of my Savior ever feeling that way about me, that I have turned away from Him, or forgotten Him. I am sure that there are times when He does, and that bothers me. I want to live my life in a way that I will feel like I am always there, under his protective wing, all gathered in.
And at this time of seemingly unquenchable pain and intolerable suffering that is abounding everywhere, this is my simple prayer.... I want to picture every single one of the survivors, the children whose eyes beheld and whose ears heard, the other staff and the paramedics and the police forces, and the families of the slain....each and every one of them....being enveloped in His wing, wrapped in the warmth and comfort of His truths, and held in His loving embrace.
I pray for that, for each one of them, for today, and for every day that they are hurting, until that perfect day, when all evil will be GONE, when Christ will reign personally upon the Earth.
At this Christmas time, there is one song that keeps replaying through my mind over and over and over, and I sing it with real intent and desire, "O Come, O Come, Emmanuel."
Oh, come, oh, come, Emmanuel,
And ransom captive Israel,
That mourns in lonely exile here
Until the Son of God appear.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to you, O Israel!
Oh, come O Rod of Jesse's stem,
From ev'ry foe deliver them
That trust your mighty pow'r to save;
Bring them in vict'ry through the grave.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to you, O Israel!
Oh, come, O Key of David, come,
And open wide our heav'nly home;
Make safe the way that leads on high,
And close the path to misery.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to you, O Israel!
Oh, come, our Dayspring from on high,
And cheer us by your drawing nigh,
Disperse the gloomy clouds of night,
And death's dark shadows put to flight.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to you, O Israel!
Oh, come, Desire of nations, bind
In one the hearts of all mankind;
Oh, bid our sad divisions cease,
And be yourself our King of Peace.
Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel
Shall come to you, O Israel!
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Just a little VACAY!
It seems like we are on the track for a "once in every FIVE years vacation" timing. We went to Disneyland in 2007 as a family, and left sweet baby MILES with my ever-charitable and compassionate cousin, Carol. So, we have been saving up funds ever since, and finally decided to take our next big family vacation, this time to San Diego. Once again, the ever-charitable and compassionate cousin, Carol, volunteered (or more like let me coerce her) into watching not only ONE, but TWO babies for us. We left Miles and Emerson (both still in diapers, mind you) with her for 4 and a half days! It allowed for just the 7 of us (Greg and me and the oldest 5 kids) to have a great time in sunny San Diego. We loved the rental house, the beach, the San Diego Zoo, Sea World, the Mormon Batallion, shopping at a Hispanic supermarket where we were the only gringos in the whole place, playing endless games in the car, eating at McDonalds WAYTOOMANY times, sitting up late at nights in the hot tub together eating ice cream, and just making memories. It was totally worth the over 2400 miles and $1000 in gas! (I keep telling myself that part). Here are a few pics from our trip...which went like this:
Drive to Saint George (thanks for letting us use your place, Nancy)
Drive to Vegas (church with Madsens, leave babies in the Nursery and took off)
Drive to San Diego - (Sea World, San Diego Zoo, Mormon Battalion, Camp Pendelton, Beach, etc.)
Drive to Vegas (mug on my sweet boys who didn't miss me for a minute, ate Ko-Mex (Korean Mexican food), hot-tubbing with Carol and Dan, tons of thought-provoking conversation!
Drive to Price (sleep over at Gr. and Gr. Baileys)
Drive to Idaho Falls, unload the van into the front room, and everyone crashed to sleep!
****JUST KIDDING!!! I tried to upload photos from our trip on here and it is telling me that I have exceeded my limit. What the?? Who knew? I feel like I don't blog that often and I have 'reached my limit'? Really? Weird. Oh well - you'll have to just look at the ones I uploaded to Facebook from the trip! ;)****
It was a lot of miles, a lot of calories, a lot of pictures taken, a lot of car time together, and a lot of SMILES. I am so glad we went and I can't wait for the next family vacation that will hopefully come sooner than 5 years from now - because at that point, we will likely have 2 kids on missions! AAAAAHHHH!
Drive to Saint George (thanks for letting us use your place, Nancy)
Drive to Vegas (church with Madsens, leave babies in the Nursery and took off)
Drive to San Diego - (Sea World, San Diego Zoo, Mormon Battalion, Camp Pendelton, Beach, etc.)
Drive to Vegas (mug on my sweet boys who didn't miss me for a minute, ate Ko-Mex (Korean Mexican food), hot-tubbing with Carol and Dan, tons of thought-provoking conversation!
Drive to Price (sleep over at Gr. and Gr. Baileys)
Drive to Idaho Falls, unload the van into the front room, and everyone crashed to sleep!
****JUST KIDDING!!! I tried to upload photos from our trip on here and it is telling me that I have exceeded my limit. What the?? Who knew? I feel like I don't blog that often and I have 'reached my limit'? Really? Weird. Oh well - you'll have to just look at the ones I uploaded to Facebook from the trip! ;)****
It was a lot of miles, a lot of calories, a lot of pictures taken, a lot of car time together, and a lot of SMILES. I am so glad we went and I can't wait for the next family vacation that will hopefully come sooner than 5 years from now - because at that point, we will likely have 2 kids on missions! AAAAAHHHH!
Thursday, August 30, 2012
REUNITING!!!!
Reunion. Reunite. What precious words those are. What meaning they behold. It has been my privilege over that last two months to attend FIVE separate reunions!
NUMBER ONE
We started out in Park City for the James and Paula Bailey reunion. One of the greatest things about being a relatively young and small family is that everyone is there. This is something that amazes me about the reunions that Paula throws together, she somehow manages to have EVERY. SINGLE. PERSON there!! I honestly do not know of a time in my recent memory (or at all) on my side of the family that everyone has been there.
Bailey's have started some fun traditions: meeting in or around Park City every single summer. Riding the Alpine slide and the Alpine Coaster. Playing capture the flag, competitively, at a park, for hours. The Annual Spud Derby where everyone who wants to, carves a potato, sticks Pinewood Derby wheels in it, and then races them down the actual pinewood Derby tracks! There is even a trophy that the winner takes with them throughout the year and then is handed over to the next champion that next summer! This so far has been won by the same family both years in a row...but no hard feelings at all. ;)
It is really so much fun because they can carve it into whatever shape they want. Landen carved his into a taco, Maelynn carved hers into a piece of pizza, and Seth did an ice cream cone with whip cream on top. I think it was because of all of the "Ice Cream talk" around our home as I was preparing for the upcoming Groberg reunion.
The kids love playing with their cousins and the place that we were at had a really cool wrap around deck that went around the entire cabin. My kids had brought their ripstick, and there were many races around that little loop! It is always so much fun to just sit and relax without many planned activities, and have lots of free time to visit, watch TV (Greg gets his yearly TV fix when he gets to be around a real TV once or twice a year!), read, or just observe the kids playing together. Thanks a million Paula for all of the work you put into it each year. You are amazing.
The next weekend, I got to go back to Park City to stay in my sister Gayle's awesome house with my sister Jennie and three other college roomies! It was such a blast to hang out - just the 5 of us....all five of us were at BYU at the same time, all five of us served missions, all five of us are married in the temple and raising our children through similar stages of life right now...so you can imagine that we NEVER ran out of things to talk about! We spent several hours and too many dollars at the outlet shops, ate awesome food, and just relished in uplifting and fun conversations!
Thanks a million to Jennie for arranging it and inviting me, and to Gayle for letting us stay at her fun house!
NUMBER THREE
The next weekend after that, was the Biannual John H. Groberg Family reunion. 14 years ago, we started doing the reunion every other year. We took turns being in charge of them, from oldest to youngest, deciding to pair up along the way...it ended up that this year would be the tail end of the siblings (Me and Emily). In 2010 at the Aspen Grove reunion that Jennie and Tom did, me and Emily began brainstorming ideas about what our "theme" would be. It didn't take us long to decide that it would be ICE CREAM!! We truly all do LOVE the delicacy that is Ice Cream! It has been a longstanding tradition and commentary about our family, that Ice Cream is a staple food for the Grobergs! So, we began two years ago and planned and prepared for this reunion. It was a lot of work, and not everybody could make it (as previously alluded to), but I think it turned out to be wonderful!
We stayed at a large lodge that is actually a Girl's Camp for the LDS church, up in a little place called West Piney, IDAHO. It was so much fun. We had games planned, yummy food (including ice cream every day, of course!) Here are a few pics from the big 48 hours fun-fest!
On the last night there, Emily and I had arranged to have an "adults only" meeting. This was something that we had planned years ahead of time. We wanted to have a discussion about how we could all help each other out along the "ROCKY ROAD"s of life. We asked three family members to talk to us about some of the trials that they have faced/are facing and how we could best support each other through them. I honestly feel that in the great majority of situations, people never mean to offend or hurt feelings, but sometimes we don't know WHAT to say, so we don't say anything, or we try to say something that comes across the wrong way. Sometimes we feel awkward, so we don't do or say anything and thus leave people feeling even more alienated or alone. So, we had a very open and candid conversation about all of those things. From mental and physical health difficulties to divorce and loss of babies, we covered it all. I felt the spirit in that little room so strongly.
Emily shared a wonderful testimony of her visit to Gethsemane and of the Atonement and I was filled with a peace that is hard to put into words. I have never been so grateful for family. I KNOW that my family is a blessing and a guide to me as I struggle down my own 'rocky roads' in life. I am so grateful for each and every one of my family members.
NUMBER FOUR
Then as soon as we wrapped things up at West Piney, we all headed straight to Idaho Falls for the beginning of the D.V. Groberg Reunion. D.V. stands for Delbert Valentine and he was my very wonderful grandfather on my Dad's side.
It was so much fun to get to spend time with all of my cousins and to see those who I only get to see on the rare occasion that we actually have an extended reunion. I am sure that Grandma and Grandpa were very pleased from up in Heaven that we were making the effort to get together.
A lot of people traveled a long way to be there.
Of course all ELEVEN of me and my siblings were still together.
My sister actually got a picture of all eleven of the kids with mom and dad. It is absolutely crazy to me to see us all together and think of how OLD we are all getting.
It is hard for me to even grasp onto the fact that my parents are 78!! Wow!
The best part was that for all 4 nights in a row of the two reunions, I was up until nearly 1 or 2 am just visiting and playing with siblings. It was like when you are so starving and you just fill up and practically gorge yourself on delicious food...that is how it was for me, like I just couldn't get enough of my siblings, since I never get to be around them. I filled up as much as I could, hoping it would last me until the next time.
Here is a great picture of a bunch of family gathered in my kitchen eating ice cream and just visiting and playing.
At one point there were like 21 or more people in my kitchen. I tried to snap a picture to capture the tangible love that was there.
Someone said to me when everyone was leaving how I would be so glad to have the noise and chaos all gone, but I have to admit, and this happens every time, I actually got sort of depressed when they all left, like a big let down. I sometimes think this is to prepare me mentally - a 'foreshadow of things to come' so to say, for what I may feel when my own children start to leave home.
Even though people always look forward to their kids leaving or just growing up, they always seems to miss it at some point....the chaos, the noise, the incessant messes (ok, maybe not that last part)!
NUMBER FIVE
A few weeks later we decided to travel to Utah to be there for the Sabin reunion. This is my mom's side of the family. She has a sister and a brother and all of their children and grandchildren and some greats came. We had a wonderful dinner for the adults at my mom's house one night and the next day was a day of Olympic games at a park, and a delicious catered meal including Cold Stone ice cream. (I get it from BOTH sides of the family - I am completely genetically predisposed to my addiction to it!)
It was fun to see some cousins that I never get to spend time with. While visiting around the table one night, I was struck by a conversation that some family members were having. One of my brother-in-laws was talking to another cousin who is a physician. He was saying how his own son was debating on whether to go to PA school or Medical school, because of all of the schooling. The physician's wife stated something along the lines of, "If you stop and think about it - life is just life, whether you are in school or working, it just goes on. It's not as if the day you begin a job your life is going to be that much better. Some of our best memories and experiences were while we were in medical school". It was a simple comment, but it made me pause and think about how true that is. We LOVED our time spent in Iowa/Nebraska as super duper poor college students. We made lifelong friends and memories in that period. Life just marches forward, and regardless of whether we are in school or working a job every day, it really depends of how we CHOOSE to live our life that will impact our happiness. I don't know why, but I loved those thoughts. Thanks, Adrianne.
I can't begin to express how much I LOVE LOVE LOVE my family. When I see people from somewhat broken homes or with broken relationships with their siblings, or those who have NO siblings, it breaks my heart.
I love that Greg has such a deep inner pull and longing to be with his parents and siblings. I understand it. I think that FAMILY is the greatest gift to have while we are here in mortality. I hope that every one of my family members knows how much I love them and how grateful I am to have them and their influence in my life. I know that on a larger scale, we are all indeed SIBLINGS, brothers and sisters as children of God. I hope to be able to have the same feelings and joyous love as we gather at our upcoming REUNION on the other side of the veil after this life.
Although I am truly not much for summertime in general (Heat = Blech. Bugs = Blech. Sweat = Blech. Whiny Kids = Blech. Did I say, HEAT? = Blech.)...there is one silver lining to it all, and that is: FAMILY REUNIONS!
NUMBER ONE
We started out in Park City for the James and Paula Bailey reunion. One of the greatest things about being a relatively young and small family is that everyone is there. This is something that amazes me about the reunions that Paula throws together, she somehow manages to have EVERY. SINGLE. PERSON there!! I honestly do not know of a time in my recent memory (or at all) on my side of the family that everyone has been there.
Bailey's have started some fun traditions: meeting in or around Park City every single summer. Riding the Alpine slide and the Alpine Coaster. Playing capture the flag, competitively, at a park, for hours. The Annual Spud Derby where everyone who wants to, carves a potato, sticks Pinewood Derby wheels in it, and then races them down the actual pinewood Derby tracks! There is even a trophy that the winner takes with them throughout the year and then is handed over to the next champion that next summer! This so far has been won by the same family both years in a row...but no hard feelings at all. ;)
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| ice cream and taco carved spud cars |
It is really so much fun because they can carve it into whatever shape they want. Landen carved his into a taco, Maelynn carved hers into a piece of pizza, and Seth did an ice cream cone with whip cream on top. I think it was because of all of the "Ice Cream talk" around our home as I was preparing for the upcoming Groberg reunion.
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| seth holding his creation |
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| miles, nash, and emerson - bath-time fun! |
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| miles and cousins |
NUMBER TWO
The next weekend, I got to go back to Park City to stay in my sister Gayle's awesome house with my sister Jennie and three other college roomies! It was such a blast to hang out - just the 5 of us....all five of us were at BYU at the same time, all five of us served missions, all five of us are married in the temple and raising our children through similar stages of life right now...so you can imagine that we NEVER ran out of things to talk about! We spent several hours and too many dollars at the outlet shops, ate awesome food, and just relished in uplifting and fun conversations!
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| the beautiful view from gayle's porch |
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| chocolate crepes with fresh raspberries -YUM! |
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| we all did our own mani/pedi's in patriotic themes |
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| the 5 college roomies: Kim, Julia, Jennie, Viki, Wendy |
Thanks a million to Jennie for arranging it and inviting me, and to Gayle for letting us stay at her fun house!
NUMBER THREE
The next weekend after that, was the Biannual John H. Groberg Family reunion. 14 years ago, we started doing the reunion every other year. We took turns being in charge of them, from oldest to youngest, deciding to pair up along the way...it ended up that this year would be the tail end of the siblings (Me and Emily). In 2010 at the Aspen Grove reunion that Jennie and Tom did, me and Emily began brainstorming ideas about what our "theme" would be. It didn't take us long to decide that it would be ICE CREAM!! We truly all do LOVE the delicacy that is Ice Cream! It has been a longstanding tradition and commentary about our family, that Ice Cream is a staple food for the Grobergs! So, we began two years ago and planned and prepared for this reunion. It was a lot of work, and not everybody could make it (as previously alluded to), but I think it turned out to be wonderful!
We stayed at a large lodge that is actually a Girl's Camp for the LDS church, up in a little place called West Piney, IDAHO. It was so much fun. We had games planned, yummy food (including ice cream every day, of course!) Here are a few pics from the big 48 hours fun-fest!
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| grandpa and kids play lawn bowling |
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| greg carries miles on the hike |
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| landen looking very determined about something |
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| greg coaching seth about frisbee golf |
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| seth and cousin nate racing |
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| uncle dustin teaches kids to do balloon animals |
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| maelynn runs for a frisbee |
Emily shared a wonderful testimony of her visit to Gethsemane and of the Atonement and I was filled with a peace that is hard to put into words. I have never been so grateful for family. I KNOW that my family is a blessing and a guide to me as I struggle down my own 'rocky roads' in life. I am so grateful for each and every one of my family members.
NUMBER FOUR
Then as soon as we wrapped things up at West Piney, we all headed straight to Idaho Falls for the beginning of the D.V. Groberg Reunion. D.V. stands for Delbert Valentine and he was my very wonderful grandfather on my Dad's side.
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| seth, eden, grace, josh, sadie |
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| John senior and John junior (my pops and my big bro) |
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| sadie ann |
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| grace, eden, sadie - COUSINS are the best |
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| my very talented niece and nephews |
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| Lane - in his element - running off to somewhere |
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| sadie attempting the slackline |
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| The ones who started it all - my dear dear Grandparents - MISS YOU BOTH! |
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| My beautiful Maelynn Joy suckin' on a bit o' heaven (creamies) |
It was so much fun to get to spend time with all of my cousins and to see those who I only get to see on the rare occasion that we actually have an extended reunion. I am sure that Grandma and Grandpa were very pleased from up in Heaven that we were making the effort to get together.
A lot of people traveled a long way to be there.
Of course all ELEVEN of me and my siblings were still together.
 |
| Back: John, Jane, Me, Sue, Gayle, Tom, Liz, Nancy, Emily Front: Jennie, Mom, Dad, Marilyn |
My sister actually got a picture of all eleven of the kids with mom and dad. It is absolutely crazy to me to see us all together and think of how OLD we are all getting.
It is hard for me to even grasp onto the fact that my parents are 78!! Wow!
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| Sweet shades, no? |
The best part was that for all 4 nights in a row of the two reunions, I was up until nearly 1 or 2 am just visiting and playing with siblings. It was like when you are so starving and you just fill up and practically gorge yourself on delicious food...that is how it was for me, like I just couldn't get enough of my siblings, since I never get to be around them. I filled up as much as I could, hoping it would last me until the next time.
Here is a great picture of a bunch of family gathered in my kitchen eating ice cream and just visiting and playing.
At one point there were like 21 or more people in my kitchen. I tried to snap a picture to capture the tangible love that was there.
Someone said to me when everyone was leaving how I would be so glad to have the noise and chaos all gone, but I have to admit, and this happens every time, I actually got sort of depressed when they all left, like a big let down. I sometimes think this is to prepare me mentally - a 'foreshadow of things to come' so to say, for what I may feel when my own children start to leave home.
Even though people always look forward to their kids leaving or just growing up, they always seems to miss it at some point....the chaos, the noise, the incessant messes (ok, maybe not that last part)!
NUMBER FIVE
A few weeks later we decided to travel to Utah to be there for the Sabin reunion. This is my mom's side of the family. She has a sister and a brother and all of their children and grandchildren and some greats came. We had a wonderful dinner for the adults at my mom's house one night and the next day was a day of Olympic games at a park, and a delicious catered meal including Cold Stone ice cream. (I get it from BOTH sides of the family - I am completely genetically predisposed to my addiction to it!)
It was fun to see some cousins that I never get to spend time with. While visiting around the table one night, I was struck by a conversation that some family members were having. One of my brother-in-laws was talking to another cousin who is a physician. He was saying how his own son was debating on whether to go to PA school or Medical school, because of all of the schooling. The physician's wife stated something along the lines of, "If you stop and think about it - life is just life, whether you are in school or working, it just goes on. It's not as if the day you begin a job your life is going to be that much better. Some of our best memories and experiences were while we were in medical school". It was a simple comment, but it made me pause and think about how true that is. We LOVED our time spent in Iowa/Nebraska as super duper poor college students. We made lifelong friends and memories in that period. Life just marches forward, and regardless of whether we are in school or working a job every day, it really depends of how we CHOOSE to live our life that will impact our happiness. I don't know why, but I loved those thoughts. Thanks, Adrianne.
I can't begin to express how much I LOVE LOVE LOVE my family. When I see people from somewhat broken homes or with broken relationships with their siblings, or those who have NO siblings, it breaks my heart.
I love that Greg has such a deep inner pull and longing to be with his parents and siblings. I understand it. I think that FAMILY is the greatest gift to have while we are here in mortality. I hope that every one of my family members knows how much I love them and how grateful I am to have them and their influence in my life. I know that on a larger scale, we are all indeed SIBLINGS, brothers and sisters as children of God. I hope to be able to have the same feelings and joyous love as we gather at our upcoming REUNION on the other side of the veil after this life.
Wednesday, August 29, 2012
MILES TURNS 3!!
For the past three years it has been our privilege and pleasure to have little Miles Ivan Bailey in our family. He is honestly one of the sweetest children I know - he has brought oodles of joy into all of our lives. He is full of adventure and spunk and loves to be going going going all day. He will be anybody's helper who asks! Three things that I LOVE about this kid:
HIS ATTITUDE!!!
HIS SMILE!!!
I LOVE YOU Mr. Miles!
HIS ATTITUDE!!!
HIS INDEPENDENCE!!!
HIS SMILE!!!
I LOVE YOU Mr. Miles!
Friday, July 20, 2012
HOGLE ZOO
This year we decided to have a fun time at the HOGLE ZOO with family. We actually ended up buying a year pass - so we hope to make it down there for more trips in the next year! It is such a great zoo...and our resident family photographer, Maddy Powell, came with us to help out...she took 100% of all of these great photos!
Me and Maddy took 10 kids - so it was quite a bit of work - but lots of fun. We especially always love the great bird show. Something majestic about those wonderful creatures swooping over your head like that! ;)
Me and Maddy took 10 kids - so it was quite a bit of work - but lots of fun. We especially always love the great bird show. Something majestic about those wonderful creatures swooping over your head like that! ;)
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| Quizzical look on Emerson's face |
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| thank goodness for the older kids who helped us out with turns carrying the babies |
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| this is HONESTLY the biggest smile captured on this kid - I swear ! Don't believe me? Wait till the end on this crazy long photo segment! |
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| trying to catch a bird |
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| Just a silly monkey head - Oh, and a statue, too!! |
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| the monkey dons the BYU hat and sunglasses. |
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| "Um, excuse me, but ain't she a bit big for this?" |
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| BOYS ---sheesh! |
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| gotta love those shades, girl |
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| silly Sadie sittin' in an Ape's lap |
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| all 10 little monkeys |
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| Miles - what an appropriate SHIRT you wore, little buddy! |
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| I'm cool and you know it! |
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| "Dude...this was my NEST first!" |
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| seal |
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| livin' the cool life in the zoo |
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| this is soooooo cool! |
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| Polar Bear... |
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| roasted polar bears!! ;) |
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| Lane: "Is that a weird stranger taking a shot of me?" |
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| Monkey see, monkey do... |
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| sweetest smiles around |
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| Landen is REALLY enjoying the parching heat and whiny kids! |
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| "What are YOU looking at?" |
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| naptime |
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| josh and seth |
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| maddy and the girls...what a great cousin she is! |
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| seth, are you HOLDING that giraffe on the palm of your hand? |
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| I'm stinkin' HOT, people!! |
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| the infamous two-finger suck |
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| feeling the mister |
And, as one can surmise without too much deduction - Maddy LOVES to take pictures of baby Emerson! He is probably something of a challenge to be conquered for a photographer - that ever elusive SMILE - where can one chubby 18 month old hide a smile at?
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| here? |
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| inside there? |
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| it's getting close.... |
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| this has got to be it?? |
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| wait, did i get it? |
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| um..Hello?? |
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| Fine - I'll just scrunch up my nose like usual. |
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| Yea - that's right. |
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| Like this - scrunch it up.... |
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| Ahhhh....Emerson - we LOVE your scrunchy nosed-cheesy-"SMILE"!! |
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